When I was younger I got my hand X-rayed
And the doctor predicted that I would grow to be 6'2" to 6'4"
It was like a magic trick.
I was a little disappointed when I stopped growing
And I kind of blamed the doctor for my unhappiness
My last girlfriend was the same height as me
And it made sex difficult
Because I like tossing short girls around
And making their bodies do what I imagine in my head would be fun for them.
I would rather not have sex than witness a fake orgasm,
Because they make me feel like I'm being pitied or maybe insulted somehow
In elementary school I had a crush on a girl whose family were Jehovah's Witnesses
And she didn't say the 'Pledge of Allegiance'.
Elementary School Me thought that this was strange and attractive,
Though I religiously stood, palm to heart, and joined in every time,
I always wanted to stand apathetically with her, and maybe smirk and wink
And mouth the words 'I'm a rebel too, darlin''
I live with a family of Evangelical Christians
And they speak in tongues and cry loudly during church
And there are hundreds of them that all cry together
And believe in things
All while I'm tossing short girls around
And making their bodies do what I imagine in my head would be fun.
- ► 2012 (10)
- POME ABOOT POPULE
- 'OUT' OF LOVE
- BEWILDERMENT SUNSHINE
- AN ODE BORN IN SECRET
- THIS IS A POME PUSHING TRANSCENDENCE
- INSEMINATION FAIL
- ME, RANTING. BECAUSE OF COFFEE.
- CONCERNING THONGS AND PUSH-UP BRAS
- FEELINGS THAT HURT (A LOT)
- I AGREE
- WHAT GUYS LIKE (!!!???)
- KINDA PROUD
- THERE'S THIS DRAMA IN MY BOOT
- WHAT HAPPENS WHEN HUMANS DON'T NEST PROPERLY IN SP...
- THE FIRST PODCAST
- I HATE FAKE ORGASMS
- THE DEIFICATION OF WOMEN
- OMGWTF WHY HAVEN'T I COVERED THIS YET!?
- I DON'T KNOW HOW THIS HAPPENED
- DAFT PUNK VIDEO: SOMETHING ABOUT US
- ▼ April 2009 (25)